just got a whole bunch of new ones, courtesy of geothebio, so I thought I’d share my collection.
I’ve got a joke: What walks on 8 legs until it’s one year old, 4 legs until its twenty years old, and then 2 legs for the remainder of it’s life?
WHY WOULD YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT PLEASE IF THIS IS A JOKE IT’S NOT FUNNY
YOU FUCKING BASTARD WHY
So, I’ve noticed this website has a thing for dragons, and dragons being feminists, and generally better representation in fantasy in general, so i thought ya’ll might like this plot i made up:
In this world, princesses get ‘apprenticed’ to dragons when they are old enough to live up in caves in the mountains, and the dragons (who are very old and know everything) teach them how to be really awesome and badass queens. There’s these two dragons, Caro and Runic, who are waiting for their princesses. Caro can’t wait to teach her princess all about fighting and swords and nature and how to be a warrior queen. Runic is excited to teach his princess new languages, and how to be a diplomat, and all about history. But then the princesses show up, and Caro’s is all like, ‘I’m so excited to learn to speak dragon!’ and Caro’s like, ‘but swords…’ and Runic’s princess’s first sentence to him is “I’m Prince, not a princess, and one day i’ll marry a smart, beautiful queen who can do all the diplomatic things that I’m bad at, and I can command the army!” and Runic is sad because he wanted to read with his prince. So they trade, and Runic and the princess read history books and practice the art of ruling a queendom, and Caro and the prince head to the woods to do the whole “swift as a coursing river” thing and also find a witch for some good ol’ sex change/ break-the-curse-of-being-born-with—the-wrong genitals magic. And in the end the prince and the princess get together and go down from the moutons and rule as king and queen, and maybe Caro and Runic get together too.
so in Japanese, we sang Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
here’s a general gist of the translation:
Rudolph had a shiny nose
no one liked him
he cried every night
then one Christmas it was dark
Santa decided Rudolph’s nose was convenient (literally it says convenient)
Rudolph was useful.
I SHIT YOU NOT.
That’s basically the song without all of the fluff, though.
IT’S LIKE A VULCAN CHRISTMAS CAROL
i cant even make it past the table of contents im laughing too hard
WHAT IS THIS BOOK!?!
It’s called “Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes: A No-Bullshit Guide to World Mythology”
By Cory O’Brien, and it looks highly entertaining. :D
Gilgamesh: THE ULTIMATE BROMANCE
Give it here, now.
Sweet Fluffy Gods why is there not an audiobook version?
I need to find this book.
The first time Iv’e wanted to read something since Metro 2033.
guys…look what we did :D